I began writing this blog in my early 20’s – desperate to escape my family, – deeply in love with the idea of “love”, – and deeply sexually repressed by a Psychopathic father, – and Narcissistic Mother.
I ask for your forgiveness for any excesses. But, – I want you to know – that this blog was written to satisfy many motives and purposes. It was my back door, my escape hatch, I had hope it would become something if not a year from publication, then 2 years, 5 years, 10 years — but while it did can a significant amount of traffic early on – my waining interest let it fall by the way side.
Today, I want to make a statement, or rather a restatement.
I have never been, – and will never be interested in repressing all women everywhere.
All I’ve ever wanted is a beautiful wife, – and a family.
This blog was about coming to terms with my own sexuality which due to the nature of my parenting, socialization, – and native community – was deeply intertwined with power and status — like most people from Eastern culture.
What I wanted was falcons to be prized – not bitches to be beaten.
And, I was, and remain deeply worthy of such prizing.
Such an impulse while much resolved into more natural desires remains with me – and was always an expression of my love for Maslow’s “Farthest Reaches of Human Nature”.
My enemies have sought to prove to me my unworthiness, – to dishonor me, – and to kill me.
But, insh’Allah (if God wants) – I shall vanquish them, yet.
Sincerely,
Saiyid Hassan Ali al-Amriki
Enslave Her 
Dear Saiyid, is it possible to get a copy of your book somewhere? ‘Enslave her’… I will deeply appreciate it.
Dear Florian,
It was removed form Amazon, — and the backup was on an old laptop. I am considering rewriting it.
Hearing why someone would want that – might help.
I’ve mature a lot in the last decade – but I sitl sicnerely beleieve that people who grow up subject to dehumanizing forces – can greatly benefit from BDSM as therapy — and that in the Crypto-Feudal Society in which we live — BDSM – is a good idea between consenting adults.
Syed,
Thank you for your reply, it is an honour to meet you.
I am happy to tell you my story and if it helps you rewrite the book, even better.
I grew up with a narcissistic mother which has had quite an effect on my adult sexual relationships. I have felt distrust, I easily felt used, I was often overwhelmed by women’s needs and I have spent quite extensive time periods in passive aggressive and latent states of anger. As a result my various sexual relationships have usually only lasted about one to two years. There was no violence but a form of low grade emotional abuse, guilt, inability to get close and such.
I have already felt a draw towards BDSM ever since I was a young man, as I always felt there would be some kind of salvation in it for me, however I never seemed to be able to come completely to terms with it, so I never really made the step to put it into action. I always felt these two forces in me, the desire to dominate but also guilt with anger.
I am in my mid forties now and due to fortunate circumstances and a chunk of hard work, I have been able to let go of anger and guilt, as well as having gained in strength and confidence at the same time.
I was lucky to learn some important things about women and men over the last few years as well and I have not only come to full terms with my dominant desires but I also recognise women’s innate submissive nature. I see both aspects as strengths now, rather than a limitation. I am attracted to this submission and it gives me strength to take power at the right time. I can see the entire beautiful natural interplay of nature, what it aches to be, laid out clearly in front of me.
In search of some guidance, I stumbled across your blog. I have never met a man, who expressed himself so utterly without compromise in this manner. It is quite honestly really refreshing. I have no doubt that this teaching you have inherited and integrated is not always meant for the mainstream. The utter lack of compromise with which you write can sure also create misunderstandings, I would imagine. I like to think I understand it though. It feels like one of those things in which one looks for a fitting next piece of the puzzle of life and what comes along just fits perfectly, as if meant to be. What I feel from you has depth. This voluntary process of giving oneself fully by free will, fulfilling a deep longing, in an interplay with masculine empowerment taking charge fully and so breaking free from the fog of misguided socialisation. With the little I was able to read here from you, I have received an eye opening.
I am still hoping for guidance. In the meanwhile I wish you the best and thank you for your kind reply, and that I hopefully was able to convey how unique and important your work is.
in anticipation
Florian